soft movement

i am an artifact of myself
i continue because i dont know how to stop
the mechanism is not there
theres forward and reverse and neutral
stop is only due to failure
and i am programmed not to
the real me is beyond this structure
indelibly integrated from a set of imprecise neuro stimulus connections
i the structure have no impulses except to eat sleep and mate
this would include hunting, building and protecting
but what am i now
without those being my drives
now that the satchitananda is my drive
i wake to the feeling of intense energy in me
slumbering as i do but not asleep
it whispers my name as if it knows me
i hear crys of longing from within
my temple is the crown of my realizations
my meditation is the engine of my fate
there is no tic toc structure that enables this
its from the center of the medulla cortex connected to the spinal fibre
the flow is from the external me to the internal me and the body cannot handle it
i am forgetting that structure and replacing it with ..what
a cosmic centered awareness that experiences deep moods of intense bliss
but where is the bliss center and how does awareness grow
why wasn't this taught in 5th grade along with algebra and biology
i am studying my psyche for the definite changes in its thinking
gentle persuasions to modify my behavior and mode of interacting with the rest of the world
i hear strange sounds and see new heights of visual depth when i stare into an objects surface
i am drawn to the soft movement of liquid and fire
forever a candle burns in my room
and it sends me its messages as if it was a transmitter from the SAT
i am searching for the meaning of these changes and realize
i am becoming the master of the unexplored country
where the wild things have fled and now return
for the gods were sent to destroy them
and now the gods are dead